Part 1All of us who are active on the dating scene have many questions in our mind. What kind of person should I date? How do I behave during a date? What is the result of my date? Did my date like me? Is he/she honest in what they say or I should be careful? The mind gets bombarded with questions. The situation becomes so trouble some for some of us that we get tired and say- no more dating for me.
We date a person because we are looking for a partner. Many of us may not marry the partner but we still look for long-term relationship. For that we must begin with asking about the kind of person who will be right for us. Otherwise the whole purpose is lost. Let us look at the qualities we must look for in our prospective partner.
Similarities in thinking, attraction towards each other, common values and political views and same approach towards various life situations are some of the areas we must investigate before we zero upon a person.
Attraction towards each other- if you are not attracted to the other person, nothing will work. Attraction can be of much types- physical attraction, attraction towards intellectual ability, attraction to the personality and so on. Analyze your attraction and decide if that will last for at least five years. If you think that you will no more be attracted to the person after some months, do not go ahead. Many times we are very much attracted towards a person. But after sometime the attraction wanes. This happens with physical attraction most often. You like somebody's features and body build. After some moths, you find nothing new or attractive in that body. Why that happens is a subject for psychiatrists and psychologists to decide.
In this part, we have looked at attraction. In the second part we will look more at attraction and other aspects of a long-term relationship.
Part 2
In the last article, we studied about what qualities we should look for in our dating partner. We also discussed about attraction mainly physical and how it may wane after some days. In this article, we will discuss more about attraction.
We understand that we get attracted to each other for different reasons. It may be- physical attraction, attraction towards intellectual ability, attraction to the personality and so on. We know that if physical attraction is the main criteria of our choice, we should not go ahead. That attraction may wane after some months. Let us now talk about intellectual attraction.
Intellectual ability of a high quality attracts many of us. We are amazed by the quick wit, knowledge and intelligence of a person. We think that such a person would make a great partner in life. What is better than constant intellectual stimulation? But that may not be true at all. In fact the relationship may fail badly if the gap between intellectual ability of both partners is high.
The person who is intellectually superior to you may tolerate and rather enjoy talking to you for some months. Such persons even adopt the role of a teacher and guide. But after some time they get bored. They look for somebody who matches them in intelligence. At the same time, being with a intellectual may cause inferiority complex in you after some time. The gap also makes communication very difficult in some situations. Are you looking for somebody who will dominate you with his/her intellectual capability? Are you looking for somebody who may laugh at you at times? Are you looking at somebody who may make fun of you? I do not think that any of us wants that. In the next article we will look at intellectual attraction in more detail and also talk about attraction to personality.
By CD Mohatta
CD Mohatta writes for myspace graphics and myspace comments. The site offers layouts, codes, surveys, etc. for myspace & blog users. Try quizzes at funquizcards.
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